Mmmmm.. where do i begin.. listening to Sarah McLaughlin's 'In the arms of an angel'. Sometimes a song can truely describe a moment in life... but its not about re-living or re0visiiting that moment.. not about what went wrong? why it did happen? why is it still around? what needs to be completed? and many others what where why's... its the fact of accepting that its there.. the whole process of letting it go and well ...trying to imbibe that imperfection in life..
this may be a very confusing post to many... yes it might seem that ive totally got bonkers;p.. but well sometimes its the weirdness that describes life the best..... like the song says ' memories seep through my veins'.. it fills my heart with that emotion again.. says don't give up ..not yet.. but why not.. why is there ell i dont know is it hope or stupidity..... am i human anymore? do i feel that emotion or is this feeling so powerful that ive found it and well maybe didnt handle well..
today while going through Jim Morrison's quotes i came across a v.interesting line...
"That's what real love amounts to- letting a person be what he really is. Most people love you for who you pretend to be. To keep their love, you keep pretending- performing. You get to love your pretence. It's true, we're locked in an image, an act".- Jim Morrison
really made me thing or better made me strong enough to admit that it may be possible to feel this emotion in such times when its persona is constantly redefining.. and more importantly its becoming extinct.,.. ..maybe this way i feel your presence around.. saw ur pictures today as well as the ones that slap me back to reality.. yes i mean literally slapped me .. .. mademe things just for that moment what went wrong.. or am i the only one in a fool'sd paradise still...???they say actions speak louder than words... but how do it explain it to this... this thing that rushes through my veins, my heart and reaches my mind and sees a connection beyond explanation.. i may be a fool but yes, atleast im brave enough to accept that... im trying to find that peace tonight maybe by releasing and packaging this moment in a twister of words... i wish there was a better way to describe ones true emotion.. its so difficult .. one is so overwhelmed with the emotion that your at a loss for words... surprisingly.. when i read that line.. I actually made that analysis again.. why do u do it? maybe i think too much.. but well.. i dont know i see, feel , believe and accept that there are those hidden words, emotion there.. that say give it time.. but how can i gamble anymore.. i did .. i gave it time.. gave it that moment.. things well i know what did go wrong. was it meant to going wrong?.. i dont know i dont know i just dont know... is the second chance calling.. well technically its definitely not the second chance.. but was it that doesnt let me give up on it... no its definitely not.. thats its a strong emotion.. ive moved on.. maybe wiser and practically.. i do not see it going anywhere.. but what do i describe this calling... i see you.. see you drowning yourself... in that endless pit .. you may call it work.. i call it escapism.. what are you running from..??? its your life... but yes its mine too.. we cant have everything .. and its simply not fair to be like this... why baby?why... why callin you still fills my heart with tears and endless love.. and anger... why is it...?im trying to accept... but well... i dont where this would lead... i guess weirdness is what im in love with.. ?
